Family
Family: designing the core where everyone flourishes.
The family is the most important core of society. I studied for a master's degree in family development to understand a little more about the current state of our society and to be able to support the family as a pillar of the well-being of each individual and of society.
What I learned led me to a great longing: families with more support, with more resources, something like tribes or communities. Living with others in co-housing, in extended families, in cooperatives… but it requires design, structure, and help.
In the design of Human Ecosystems, I delve into the family structure (Genogram) to identify transgenerational dynamics and I use Human Design to understand individual characteristics. Based on this, needs are recognized and strategies that work for the family are created.
All of this we do from Nonviolent Communication (to name needs without judgment), Relational Neurosciences (to embrace trauma without getting trapped in it), and Human Design (to honor the unique rhythms and characteristics of each person).
Each generation does the best it can with what it has. And “what they have” are a series of resources and also a series of generational traumas due to what was experienced in their environment: conquests, revolutions, natural disasters… That leaves the next generation with its series of resilience resources and also a series of transgenerational traumas that can be embraced with Relational Neurosciences.
Many of our parents lived through situations that led them to think that security came from managing to adjust to the rules imposed by those in power. They learned that one had to look out for oneself, compete, and be “the best” to ensure survival at all costs; this strategy helped many of them for their family to survive, and they taught their children what worked for them.
Furthermore, many of our parents lived in an environment where emotions were not discussed, where there was no intention to develop Emotional Intelligence. In recent years, science has finally been able to demonstrate that emotional intelligence is what allows for decision-making with a sustainable vision and that focusing solely on intellectual reasoning is what has led us to so much separation, so much violence, and so much pain.
Bert Hellinger says that “Emotional chains are transmitted from generation to generation until someone conscious breaks them.” With the design of Human Ecosystems, the conditions are generated to break them and open new paths. New connections to stop repeating the past.
Sometimes changes in consciousness come from events that happen to us in life, sometimes it is the most sensitive people who can feel those chains. Whatever the way by which you come to have consciousness, what is needed is a safe space to be able to name the chains, the need they covered, the cost they had and the desire to break them to be able to start new, more empathetic paths.
If your family or your community is ready to design an environment where everyone can flourish, I want to invite you to take the first step: let's talk. Without commitment. Just to hear what is happening and see if the design of Human Ecosystems can be the way.
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